Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Boxing Day

10364 Steps

The Day after Christmas should be a Holiday in the US. I don't want to sound greedy, but no good can come of going back to work the day after Christmas.
This is what it could help to avoid: exhaustion, confusion, bitterness, raccoon eyes, raccoon breath, raccoon coat, shoddy workmanship, disorientation, price tags hanging from one's personage, irritable vowel syndrome.
I am too tired to operate blogging machinery today. Too tired. So I am just going to write crap. Please feel free to take the day off from reading.

Here are some goals for next year:
1. More sleep
2. More water
3. More exercise
4. Less coffee
5. More reading (esp. classics like "Greek Mythology for Dummies")
6. Less computer
7. More veg. eating.
8. Less prepared foods
9. More saying "Good Day to you, kind sir/madam" on the street.
10. More tipping of hat when doing 9
11. More hat purchases for tipping of.
12. More bagpiping
13. More listening to music
14. More feeling okay about not watching TV
15. More meditation.
16. More breathing.
17. More yoga
18. Less ice cream.
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Sensible Things I Would Do with Too Much Money:
1. Have weather boxes installed outside my windows so I could click a button and have whatever weather I wanted appear: Heaving, driving rain for reading, snow for Sunday mornings, hail for soup days.

2. Have a car horn that blared "FRANCE!!!! in an American accent every time I honked it. "France, France, France!"

3. Have a guy who would follow me around and photograph me and my friends. Saves having to ask other tourists and show them the right button and then pose and have to walk towards them again to set it all over.

4. Have Dettol flown in from the UK so I could clean my place with it.


5. Have someone cut my hair in my sleep. I hate getting my hair cut.

6. Have someone shave me. Unless s/he was cross with me in any way.
(I hate shaving. And I like not shaving. I think they are two different things. ) I would have my weather boxes set for "foggy then to sun" for this ritual.





7. Have a live-in computer geek/driver/coffee maker/personal-trainer/massage person who darns.

8. Have a Modigliani painting hanging in my kitchen next to the message board.




9. Have all my shoes hand made by Estruscans.
10. Go to all the "Hotdog on A Stick" locations in the US by motorhome and photograph them and journal about the experience for use later in a self-published coffee table book-slash-expose called "Hotdog on a Stick: Cultural Icon or Creepy Lolita-esque Sausage Purveyor?"(working title.)


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Things I Want to Have Less Fear of in 2008:
1. Spice racks
2. Yeast
3. Technology
4. Stunning looking people who say "Dude."
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Travels for 2008
1. Quincy, MA
2. Japan
3. The Bronx
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Work more with in 2008:
1. Fennel
2. Sorrel
3. push pins
4. fresh fish
5. post cards
6. floss
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3 comments:

Criticlasm said...

You can use Mypublisher.com

I think that's the name.

Howza about HDOAS: delicious or disturbing?

and when I say wiener, I mean....

icandy or icreepy?

Criticlasm said...

I always wanted to do a flowery coffee table book about the backsides of classical statuary called "Asses of Antiquity" or "Derriers of Dernier" or even "Behinds from Bygone". Never happened--maybe you can take the pics at the met for me.

charlotte said...

Why Quincy, MA?