At Someone Else's Expense

I was thinking about writing a blog about being unemployed and give tips on job hunting.

If I WERE to do this, one tip might be: "get working friends to take you out to dinner on expense accounts pretending you are a client." This way you both get a free meal and you get practice at being a client of something. Win, win.

My friend Concepcion McGraw (not her real name) did such a thing tonight. She took me to out to dinner and expensed it. The stress was relieved for both of us. Well, actually just for me. I didn't have to pay and I didn't need to feel guilty that she was paying for me and that I could take her out when I have a job. That thing.

We went to Candle Cafe on Third Avenue. This is a Vegan restaurant. I don't know why I capitalize Vegan, but I fear that if I don't I might piss one of them off like it is a religion or a nationality. But having made that wee dig, the people there were not like that at all. Our server (NOT servant, asswipe, I didn't say that. "Ser-ver") was tall, blond and willowy and really, really nice. With a sense of humor fit for a meat-eater. But her only steaks are made from tofu or seitan. And she had great skin. Pretty, a wry sense of humor and great skin. Oh Jesus, make me a Vegan.

Concepcion had an Indian from India inspired concoction. She threw me the naan bread since she doesn't do bread anymore. (I guess she can one-up Vegans at their own game. Soon she will be gnawing on hemp and drinking her own urine?) I had the comfort platter of weeds, and puree of something and tofu. I have to say it was excellent. We split a quinoa. It was such a lovely meal and a fun time. All at someone else's expense.

Tofu, Quinoa, Seitan. All seem like names someone in Marin would give their daughter. I'm just saying. "Tofu, don't forget yoga class after school."

All in all a perfect night spent socializing with a good friend while Rome burns and we charge her for it.

I need to get a rotation with my working stiffs and sell them on the idea that I am "good practice" for when they have real clients. This way I save money, I get to hang with people I like and they get better at their jobs. Win, win. I am such a good man.